From kindergarteners at the Newman Center to my own daughters’ Sunday School class, I’ve spent nearly four decades learning what actually works with kids. It started in college, co-teaching Confraternity of Christian Doctrine (CCD). I was hooked from that first class. I enjoyed teaching the lessons and playing with the kids. Over the years, I volunteered across a range of children’s ministries: working with kids in broken marriages, serving as a Big Brother, teaching Sunday School. When I finally married at 47, all those years had quietly prepared me to raise kids of my own — and eventually become their Sunday School teacher too.

Here are some of the things I learned.

Play is Important

In every ministry, I played with the kids. This was not just to welcome them and help them feel comfortable. This was a valuable part of the lessons and a wonderful bonding experience.

Fred Rogers famously said, “Play is really the work of childhood” emphasizing that play is not a break from learning, but rather serious and essential learning itself.

When children play, they are stimulating their memory, attention, and curiosity. As they play, they learn about cause and effect, gain understanding, and develop critical thinking.

As they interact with other children and adults, they learn vocabulary, sentence structure, and oral communication. Interaction also teaches empathy, conflict resolution, and cooperation.

I wrote more specifically about the benefits of outdoor play in this blog.

When I got down on the floor to play with the kids, I bonded with them. I was communicating to them that what they considered important was important to me.

Affection is Needed

When I worked with Kindergarten- or younger-aged kids, some would come into class crying. They often were experiencing separation anxiety. I held these kids in my arms, talked softly to them, and eventually played with them.

I remember the first time my nephew was separated from his mother, my sister. He was visiting my parents for the first time. He had never been separated from his mom. When she left, he cried, screaming for his mom. He banged on the door. I opened the door, held his tiny hand, and walked down the sidewalk until he calmed down.

Hugs and gentle touch trigger the release of oxytocin (the bonding hormone) and lower cortisol (the stress hormone), which supports healthy brain growth and neural pathways. Touch is known to lower stress and anxiety.

Kids will feel loved and secure when shown affection.  Children who feel consistently loved and valued develop stronger self-confidence, better social skills, and a deeper sense of security.

Stories Teach Better Than Lectures.

When I would read or tell stories, kids’ eyes were fixed on me. They were attentive. Sometimes they asked questions.

Stories teach what lectures cannot.

Kids grasp abstract truths (grace, sacrifice, courage) more easily through narrative than direct teaching. I’ve experienced this truth firsthand. When I lecture, the kids fidget and forget. When I tell a story, they are captivated and remember.

Princeton researchers found that the brains of storytellers and listeners mirror each other, making an emotion or concept feel deeply personal.

Stories can translate vague theories into tangible scenarios that are relatable to children. For example, rather than explaining how we should love our enemies, a story about a rat who befriends a mouse who despises him brings that idea to life.

My favorite family time with my daughters is story time. It’s a time to teach valuable lessons, but also to bond. We’d snuggle close as I read. Like many kids, they would want to read the same stories over and over even into their tweens.

Get Creative

Since we all learn differently, the lesson needs to be presented in a variety of ways. Some kids are visual, so you need to show them pictures or other concrete objects. Others are auditory learners, so speaking to them works well, but others learn better by reading or writing, so if they can read and write, let them. Some are kinesthetic (tactile). They need to touch. Crafts work well for the tactile learners.

I would often have the kids act out the lesson with me or do a puppet show. Kids loved being entertained and participating. This helps seal the lesson.

Games can also reinforce the lesson. Remember, playing is learning time. One example is to teach the concept of repentance; I would have the kids be near me and then run away. I would yell, “Repent,” and they would have to turn back toward me. Repentance is turning away from sin and turning toward God. This simple game taught and reinforced the lesson.

Repeat

I’d often teach the same concept three ways in one class — a story, a game, and a craft — and I could watch it click a little more each time.

Repetition reinforces learning. Kids won’t understand the first time, the second, or the third. As you repeat the lesson in creative ways, you are improving their chances of understanding. Repetition also helps memory. The more you hear, see, write, and feel what you need to know, the more you will be able to recall.

Enjoy

However you choose to teach, enjoy it. The kids will learn and engage in the lesson if you are enjoying the time. They can tell if you are frustrated, burnt out, or not sincere.

Proverbs 22:6 says, “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” There is value in what we teach our children that will last and pay dividends far into their adulthood. You may never know the impact you will have, but I guarantee, on the authority of Scripture, you will have an impact.

As a teacher or a parent, you are shaping the next generation and making an impact not only on the children but on our future world.